Flaws

People are:
Stupid
Incompetent
Single Minded
Living in either the past, future or present
Judging on first reaction
Finding pleasure in hurting


The last comment (finding pleasure in hurting) includes a fuck load of things such as:
Rape
Harassment
Torture
Insanity
War
Violence
The Putting Down Of Others.

Etc etc.

I broke my thoughts of all people being stupid. And seeing all their flaws. That was recently. (the past year) I finally could see how people were TRYING to act, even if they weren't succeeding. I didnt doubt their intelligence, only doubted their common sense. I think I doubt everything about them now.

People may read this and say "wow she's an arrogant bitch, insulting everyone but her"
I said PEOPLE didnt I?
and I not a person?
I do believe as a person, I am stupid and incompetent.
However, I believe my MIND is not.
Whether or not someone will ever try to understand me,
my mind is my most cherished possession, it is ME.
No one will ever understand me fully, and that hurts.

But.
As many know, I dont believe there is an afterlife of any sort.
Your body is left behind.
But your "soul" (your mind in my opinion) is extinguished, and will cease to exist.
Rather than get into a whole debate about why that is,
I will say this:
Yes it is something you dont want to believe.
It is HARD to believe.

Which is why i cherish my mind, after I "die". I will cease to exist, and the thing I will miss the most, is being able to think.
If asked the question:
"would you rather cease to exist or be stuck with your mind for ETERNITY"
(I've been asked this a lot)
I would have to answer:
"I do not know."

All I know is, my mind is special, because it's one of a kind.
It finds fault in every person.
And accepts only a few.

The only person
I do NOT find fault in,
is Edward.

He is, one of a kind. And no one will ever come close to that level of innocence and intelligence.



So before I insult my friends with this,
yes I do love most of you.
But you annoy the living shit out of me...
I'm trying though... but I'm going to give up pretending I'm something I'm not soon.

Apparently it's not worth it.

yet to find someone I can actually talk to.
Phylicia doesnt really work now sadly. I dont think she's interested in hearing my pathetic problems =(
Sara - Obviously cant keep my fcking life a SECRET.
Gabe - ass.
Winny - well.... you cant really rant to her D:
Krissy - close ;o
Alex - she over reacts... but otherwise...

Well whatever =/
I'm learning this year that maybe coming out of a shell ISNT good. People know more about you, causing you to be a possible subject to pain or backstabbing. The more people know, the more they're okay with talking about you.

I'm kinda pissed right now.
Gabe and Sara, REALLY, pissed me off.
Mostly Gabe...

There. is. one. thing. I. always. follow.
I do NOT intrude in other people's business, unless it has intruded upon me. (meaning if it's affecting my life or possibly threatening another life)
There's a thin line between that.
Do I talk about people behind their backs?
No.
Am I always perfect?
No.
Do I join in on bashing?
No.
Do I stick up for that person?
No. Not usually.

Why?
Sticking up for the person usually involves myself into their life. I'd rather keep myself separate depending on the case. May seem bitchy but that's how I am.

WARNING: RANT COMING

People, judge by first reaction. I tell someone about what Im interested in becoming (job wise) which I NEVER talk about, and that person immediatly makes a rash judgement.
They earn no respect.

Second thing that happened today was my friend apparently spilling something she THOUGH I was feeling towards a guy.
O_o lovely.
I dont think I would have minded as much if it were true.
But, it isnt. =( sadly.
I've turned my emotions towards others off a while ago. So guys wont effect me.
It's not worth it, especially in High school.

I'm just pissed off that this guy made some kind of judgement on me even if he didnt realize it. If that's not what he intended, well kinda sucks to be him... it's what I noticed. (I may be wrong...)
I'm sorry for what I've said above, if it's insulted or harmed someone.
But I'm in a weird mood again.

You've succeeded in pushing me back to my prior state, which personally... I like O_o;;

Instead of being caring and persistant.

I think I'll be the real Lizz.
I dont give a fck about drama, dont include me.
I DO care for people, but I dont involve myself as much.
And Worst thing about my true self:
I find all people incompetent and stupid to be honest.

I'd have to say the closest 2 people have been to NOT being like the rest, is Krissy and Diddy.
I love them <3

I've really starting to hate this post, but I should post it anyways. I'll write another right after.