Current Update on Friends 2.0:
-- Have I decided to give my friends the link yet? : Verdict is no xD too lazy
Current Update on School 2.0:
-- Have I reached a verdict on homeschooling? : Verdict is "most likely not" I changed my mind yet again
-- Have I conversed with my parents? : Not Yet
Current News:
I made a new blog. To post a story in! and so far I'm up to chapter four. Feel free to read it if you want, it's a bit morbid x_x
Blog Link Here <3
Monday, July 14, 2008
School 2.0
Background Info:
This year, I had the school tell me maybe I should be home schooled. I refused because I was afraid that would make me isolated or lose my friends, that or make me grow away from my friends slash make them forget me. My mother agreed that at the time, it probably wouldn't be good for my social life.
Today:
I went to summer gym today and was reminded about how idiotic my classmates and teachers are and how they don't CARE or understand. I told a gym teacher I needed to stop, I had a headache and she told me to keep on going. I was ready to drop kick her in the face. Plus my classmates try giving me fake sympathy or stares when they learn I'm still completing classes or still sick. Some even moved away from me. I don't want to put up with that, I'm not some flunky or a contagious freak.
The Point:
After I thought a LOT about my friends, and how I'm ALREADY isolated... how you guys SAY you care (Im sure you do) but don't act on it, how I'm ALREADY dead relationship wise. I have NOTHING to lose. The only thing holding me back was Krissy, Sara and Gabe. I won't see Krissy in school anymore, plus she already calls me and we meet... Gabe might be moving, plus I won't see him in school anyways. The only MAJOR thing holding me back is Sara and I still don't know what to do about that.
Bottom Line:
I'm seriously considering being home-schooled. I've spent the past YEARS being so pissed at my friends, pissed at myself, pissed at my body.. everything about my life, that I dont want to go over the deep end (I know I wont xD, but I don't need any help) Plus with homeschooling I could finally try to start getting better without being majorly stressed, work at my own pace... and all of the above.
The End Conclusion:
I'll Submit a post called "The News" which will tell if I decide to or not. I haven't yet even told my mother I've considered this again. And before you all go "YAY IT WON'T HAPPEN", My mom was FOR me being homeschooled, and she offered to homeschool me herself, so if I was willing to go for it... most likely my mom will agree with me.
This year, I had the school tell me maybe I should be home schooled. I refused because I was afraid that would make me isolated or lose my friends, that or make me grow away from my friends slash make them forget me. My mother agreed that at the time, it probably wouldn't be good for my social life.
Today:
I went to summer gym today and was reminded about how idiotic my classmates and teachers are and how they don't CARE or understand. I told a gym teacher I needed to stop, I had a headache and she told me to keep on going. I was ready to drop kick her in the face. Plus my classmates try giving me fake sympathy or stares when they learn I'm still completing classes or still sick. Some even moved away from me. I don't want to put up with that, I'm not some flunky or a contagious freak.
The Point:
After I thought a LOT about my friends, and how I'm ALREADY isolated... how you guys SAY you care (Im sure you do) but don't act on it, how I'm ALREADY dead relationship wise. I have NOTHING to lose. The only thing holding me back was Krissy, Sara and Gabe. I won't see Krissy in school anymore, plus she already calls me and we meet... Gabe might be moving, plus I won't see him in school anyways. The only MAJOR thing holding me back is Sara and I still don't know what to do about that.
Bottom Line:
I'm seriously considering being home-schooled. I've spent the past YEARS being so pissed at my friends, pissed at myself, pissed at my body.. everything about my life, that I dont want to go over the deep end (I know I wont xD, but I don't need any help) Plus with homeschooling I could finally try to start getting better without being majorly stressed, work at my own pace... and all of the above.
The End Conclusion:
I'll Submit a post called "The News" which will tell if I decide to or not. I haven't yet even told my mother I've considered this again. And before you all go "YAY IT WON'T HAPPEN", My mom was FOR me being homeschooled, and she offered to homeschool me herself, so if I was willing to go for it... most likely my mom will agree with me.
Friends 2.0
Okay well.
This summer has shown me a lot, I've noticed that friends dont talk to me, and I dont talk to them. So Im a bit at fault also. But Im sick of it being like it was at Bethlehem, where EVERYTHING was set up by me, and Ialways called the person. So I adopted the same rule that's going to doom me some day. "If THEY care, they'll talk first." It keeps you from getting hurt. Well not really, it became a habit and led me into seclusion and backfired. Kinda like my relationship situation. "If THEY care they'll talk first." Bull shit, apparently guys are more shy than I give them credit for, that or Im just really not that interesting to the male gender. I figured that instead of possibly reliving what happened on my first ever date (where I only went because he was the first guy to ask me) if THEY ask, I'll judge by whether I like them or not. I dont want some guy playing with my emotions just because I asked him. Whatever I've given up on the male gender, I'm practically asexual. The only guy that's positively awesome and funny doesn't even live near me. But back to my friend situation, Im going to be a little bitch here and say yea maybe I don't have many friends. It's ironic that PHYLICIA has been acting more like a friend than a lot of you *sigh*. I dont mean that to be a jerk to Phylicia, I just mean that with all that's happened it's surprising and awesome. An imaginary cookie to FiFi! (does that mean we're friends again? D:) And I know I'm a fucking hypocrite, I don't call you guys either. Who's been in bed sick for practically the entire summer? Wow. Didn't know that? oops. Your fault I guess. If you'd call in my condition please pray tell, I'd love to hear how you'd do it. Sorry for the bitch tone, I wont say you don't deserve it, but I'm in a major stressed mood. If you had called me or talked to me recently you would know why. La Di Da.
I was gonna write here something about Gabe possibly moving, but I'm afraid I'll go ahead and flame him too for no reason so I'll just say that I'll miss him if he does.
Plus if no one remembers my birthday (which I know I told a lot of you about *as a test cough cough*) Imma be kinda... well iunno. It'll just help me make my decision (coming up in rant of "School 2.0")
Thanks to:
Phylicia: for talking and being awesome and sending me Gintama even though it wont work *cries*
Sara: Being just plain AWESOME XD I needa invite you ovveeerrr again!
Krissy: CALLING MEH and having a fat war o_o
Diddy: Cheering me up
Ash: .... do I need to say more? DDDD; <3 (Imma call and rant sometime -sigh-)
This summer has shown me a lot, I've noticed that friends dont talk to me, and I dont talk to them. So Im a bit at fault also. But Im sick of it being like it was at Bethlehem, where EVERYTHING was set up by me, and Ialways called the person. So I adopted the same rule that's going to doom me some day. "If THEY care, they'll talk first." It keeps you from getting hurt. Well not really, it became a habit and led me into seclusion and backfired. Kinda like my relationship situation. "If THEY care they'll talk first." Bull shit, apparently guys are more shy than I give them credit for, that or Im just really not that interesting to the male gender. I figured that instead of possibly reliving what happened on my first ever date (where I only went because he was the first guy to ask me) if THEY ask, I'll judge by whether I like them or not. I dont want some guy playing with my emotions just because I asked him. Whatever I've given up on the male gender, I'm practically asexual. The only guy that's positively awesome and funny doesn't even live near me. But back to my friend situation, Im going to be a little bitch here and say yea maybe I don't have many friends. It's ironic that PHYLICIA has been acting more like a friend than a lot of you *sigh*. I dont mean that to be a jerk to Phylicia, I just mean that with all that's happened it's surprising and awesome. An imaginary cookie to FiFi! (does that mean we're friends again? D:) And I know I'm a fucking hypocrite, I don't call you guys either. Who's been in bed sick for practically the entire summer? Wow. Didn't know that? oops. Your fault I guess. If you'd call in my condition please pray tell, I'd love to hear how you'd do it. Sorry for the bitch tone, I wont say you don't deserve it, but I'm in a major stressed mood. If you had called me or talked to me recently you would know why. La Di Da.
I was gonna write here something about Gabe possibly moving, but I'm afraid I'll go ahead and flame him too for no reason so I'll just say that I'll miss him if he does.
Plus if no one remembers my birthday (which I know I told a lot of you about *as a test cough cough*) Imma be kinda... well iunno. It'll just help me make my decision (coming up in rant of "School 2.0")
Thanks to:
Phylicia: for talking and being awesome and sending me Gintama even though it wont work *cries*
Sara: Being just plain AWESOME XD I needa invite you ovveeerrr again!
Krissy: CALLING MEH and having a fat war o_o
Diddy: Cheering me up
Ash: .... do I need to say more? DDDD; <3 (Imma call and rant sometime -sigh-)
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